Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Debate Drinking Game

I think my favourite part of any campaign is live-blogging the debate. So, you can be sure that I'll be doing just that tonight (en francais) and tomorrow (en anglais).

But, with 5 leaders and few big issues, the debates might turn out to be rather dull. That's why I present the 2008 Canadian Election Debate Drinking Game.

Take a drink whenever someone...
-With no chance of becoming PM says "as Prime Minister I would..."
-Tells a touching story about a senior they met on the campaign trail
-Says they are "surprised" by something unsurprising an opponent says
-mentions "Canadian values"
-mentions "average Canadians"
-says "strong leader"
-says "while I don't agree with Mr. X, at least he has taken a firm stand"
-says "Canadians are telling me"

Take a shot when someone name drops...
George Bush
Julie Couillard
Bob Rae
Brian Mulroney
Barack Obama
Ed Broadbent
John Howard

Take a sip of your shaken martini (or any pretentious drink that pretends to be cool) every time Stephen Harper...
-mentions past Liberal governments
-says "the fundamentals of the economy are strong"
-calls The Green Shift a "tax on everything"
-calls the opposition "reckless" and/or "irresponsible"
-tries to smile

Take a sip of your wine (make sure it is a local wine, so as to minimize your carbon footprint!) every time Stephane Dion...
-mentions past Liberal governments
-says something eerily similar to one of his Tory commercial lines ("it is not easy to make priorities", "that is unfair", etc)
-confuses you about The Green Shift
-mentions the environment in response to a question having nothing at all to do with the environment
-looks exasperated at something Jack Layton says

Take a chug of your good 'old working family kitchen table beer every time Jack Layton...
-promises "results for people"
-talks about "kitchen tables"
-scapegoats big banks or oil companies
-talks about ATM fees
-says something that makes you want to smack him

Take a sip of a drink you liked a decade ago but have since outgrown every time Gilles Duceppe...
-says "fe-DE-RAWL-lism"
-makes an English pop culture reference
-scapegoats Alberta
-says something incredibly ironic [see his 2006 gem "Harper, you can't keep holding votes on gay marriage just because you don't like the result"]
(notice how I don't have "mentions separatism" here since, let's be serious, he's obviously not going to)

Chug a glass of beet juice every time Elizabeth May...
-compliments Stephane Dion
-starts rambling
-inadvertently insults Canadians
-says something hopelessly idealistic

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17 Comments:

  • Don't forget to take a drink anytime someome invokes Tommy Douglas. Or mentions Harper and Bush numerous times in the same segment. Or utters any phrase including "13 years of Liberal........."

    By Anonymous Lycan Stark, at 9:23 AM  

  • drinking during the debate is a "waste of alcohol".

    it could only make E.May look like a babe.

    By Blogger art, at 10:36 AM  

  • drinking during the debate is a "waste of alcohol". it could only make E.May look like a babe.

    That would require alcohol poisoning.

    By Anonymous Lycan Stark, at 10:44 AM  

  • You're a wimp CG. I wouldn't even get a buzz playing this version. :)

    Drink for every reference (Harper or Layton) to "working families"

    Drink for every Layton reference to "boardroom"

    Drink for every Layton reference to corporate tax cuts

    Drink for every Dion reference to "recession"

    Drink for every reference to "deficit"

    Chug for any reference to abortion

    Drink for any reference to Gerry Ritz, "listeria" or "listeriosis"

    By Anonymous john g, at 11:16 AM  

  • And I forgot the most obvious. Drink for any reference to "plagiarism"

    Add all of those rules and no one will show up for work on Friday morning

    By Anonymous john g, at 11:31 AM  

  • Take a chug of your good 'old working family kitchen table beer every time Jack Layton...
    -says something that makes you want to smack him


    Oww, my freakin' liver!

    By Anonymous rod and/or todd, at 11:47 AM  

  • In honour of fallen NDP candidates, take a toke everytime you hear:
    "American style politics"
    "Karl Rove"
    "A womans right to choose"
    "Culture cuts/spending"
    "Thank God Gerard Kennedy gave us this guy"

    By Blogger nuna d. above, at 11:49 AM  

  • I'll be watching both the debates, although with these rules I'll be blasted about 15 minutes in. And have to keep drinking, which means that only during the second debate will I be sobering up, just to ingest the "hair-of-the-dog".

    Although I find these rules are for the English debate. Are there slightly-different French-language equivalents to these phrases? I want to make sure I don't cheat in the game! ;)

    Johann

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:36 PM  

  • Your rules would get someone incredibly drunk after the first 5 minutes. I'm in.

    By Blogger hatrock, at 1:04 PM  

  • anon - I think the rules should work fairly well in the French debate too. Although you should also take a shot whenever Layton mentions "Thomas Mulcair", if Dion calls himself a "nationalist", or if the Bloc is called "useless".

    By Blogger calgarygrit, at 1:56 PM  

  • Or, conversely, you can just toss out the entire sheet and take a drink whenever someone panders to Quebec voters.

    By Blogger calgarygrit, at 1:56 PM  

  • You get better and better and better - "a drink you liked a decade ago" is brilliant.

    By Blogger Bo Green, at 3:04 PM  

  • Jack doesn't need to say anything for me to want to smack him . With these rules , it's not if , it's when I start puking .


    .....might want to consider turning off the word verifier in a couple of hours though .....

    By Blogger Bill D. Cat, at 7:01 PM  

  • You can drink to Lizzy May -- but not Thin Lizzy

    By Blogger JEL, at 9:27 PM  

  • Great Game, but will anybody be watching when the competition is Palin and Biden. Go to my site if you want the American drinking game version.

    http://beingcanadian.wordpress.com/

    PS; I put a link to your story on my blog at

    http://beingcanadian.wordpress.com/

    By OpenID kurrenteventz, at 7:31 PM  

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