Monday, January 03, 2005

2005 Predictions

I may put up some serious predictions later, but for fun, here are some predictions for 2005:

-Scott Brison decides he’s not comfortable with the Liberal Party and jumps ship to the Bloc Quebecois.

-Jack Layton’s stunts of 2005 include open mouth kissing Ed Broadbent in the house to show support for equal marriage. In addition, the protest BMD, the entire NDP caucus comes to Parliament dressed up as their favourite Star Wars characters and they begin referring with Reg Alcock as “the wookie”.

-The Liberal Party hires Viktor Yanukovich and Paul Martin promptly receives 106% approval at the leadership review vote in March.

-Ralph Klein kills a homeless man with his bare hands. The Calgary Herald applauds him for “finally doing something about the homeless problem.” Klein’s popularity skyrockets when it’s revealed the homeless person was a gay, French man from Ontario.

-Gary Bettman takes Paul Martin up on his word and the PM is brought on to mediate the NHL labour dispute. The final draft document contains a salary cap. However, since they play in a distinct society, the Montreal Canadiens are exempt from the cap, ushering in the era of the asymmetrical NHL.

3 Comments:

  • These all made me laugh my head off, but I gotta say, your last two had me completely screaming!

    I've just discovered your blog recently (I have one here as well; I hope it shows up by clicking my name or something), and I've really enjoyed the recent entries.

    By Blogger Phyl, at 5:18 PM  

  • Hilarious! Loved the post.

    By Blogger Bill, at 10:54 AM  

  • adding praise to the dogpile: well done!

    By Blogger matt, at 4:49 PM  

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