They Live Among Us
Before being named GG, our current head of state had dual French-Canadian citizenship. If recent polls are to be believed, our next Prime Minister has dual French-Canadian citizenship. Hell, the star goalie for the Montreal Canadiens is a French citizen. And, assuming nothing has changed since I was in High School, French Immersion students across Canada are still being subjected to the complete works of Gerard Depardieu.
Add it all up and there's only one logical conclusion to be reached - a French invasion from within. We've known for a while that the French were out to get us - we all remember how the French figure skating judge tried to rob Sale and Pelletier of the gold in Salt Lake City. While their motive is still unclear (unlimited syrup for their French toast perhaps?), their intentions appear obvious. I call on all Canadians to hunt down your friends and neighbours with French citizenship and force them to renounce their dual citizenship. Only then can we truly be safe from this growing (bleu, blanc, et) rouge menace.